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How I Saved Roosevelt
Lyrics
That was President-elect Franklin D. Roosevelt
Ladies and gentlemen
Speaking to a crowd of supporters
Here at Miami's beautiful Bayfront Park
A group of notables are pressing in around
The President-elect's car
There's Mayor Anton Cermak of Chicago and-
There's been a shot!
I can't see!
Wait! Mister Roosevelt is waving
He's alright
But Mayor Cermak has been hit
The police have somebody in custody
An immigrant
Giuseppe Zangara
We take you now to a group of eyewitnesses
Who will tell us what they saw
We're crowded up close
And I see this guy
He's squeezing by
I catch his eye
I say to him
"Where do you think you're trying to go, boy?
Whoa, boy"
I say, "listen, you runt
You're not pulling that stunt
No gentleman pushes their way to the front"
I say, "move to the back"
Which he does, with a grunt
Which is how I saved Roosevelt
Then- well, I'm in my seat
I get up to clap
I feel this tap
I turn, this sap
He says he can't see
I say, "find a lap
And go sit on it"
Which is how I saved-
Then he started to swear
And he climbed on a chair
He was aiming a gun
I was standing right there
So I push it as hard as I could in the air
Which is how I saved Roosevelt
Lucky I was there
That's why he was standing back too far
That's why when he aimed he missed the car
Just lucky I was there
Or we'd have been left bereft of FDR
You think that I scared?
No scared
You think that I care?
No care
I look at the world
No good
No fair
Nowhere
When I am a boy, no school