lidocaine

Isn't it weird how people who show the most love

Are the ones that never truly felt it themselves?

They learned how to comfort others because no one ever comforted them

They learned how to listen because no one ever asked how they felt

They hide the pain so much that they just wish

Someone would notice they're stuck

But others don't see where that kindness came from

Because it wasn't taught

It was built through pain

In quiet rooms

On lonely nights

And from wounds they never showed

They give everything hoping someone will give enough

And they don't need much

Just presence over promises

And honesty over perfection

But most people don't notice

Because they're too used to receiving the love

If that's you and if no one ever said it to you before

I love you

And you never needed a reason to deserve it

Yeah I don't really wanna fall asleep

All these demons giving me the creeps

I been recently having bad dreams

Woke up from a dream (Yeah)

I have all this faith but don't got a place to leap

Looking at your face but I'm looking too deep

I can see how you were hurting, don't rub off on me

Everyone I ever loved finds a way to leave

I been numb to pain on lidocaine (Lidocaine)

Don't feel love got no feelings inside (Inside)

Feeling so alone

Never been alive

Trying to survive

So I cry, fake my faith

Never felt welcome in my own body

But then I learned, then I changed

So just listen to the song I made (To the song I made)

I been trying to hide, yeah I was trying to leave

But I couldn't outrun, man I couldn't escape

All these temptations they had a hold on me

And I ran from God but He was waiting for me

I was prodigal son, my demons thought they won

I had spent all my money, I felt shame so I run

Back to my home I ran back to the one