Divorce me C.O.D.

Just bought me a great long ticket

Gonna use it at 4 P.M

So you can call your secret love

And tell the news to him

You thought your little romance

Was on the strict Q.T

But if you want your freedom P.D.Q

Divorce me C.O.D

I won't be 'round

To hear you cry

I'm Texas bound

And by and by

You can reach me down in Dallas

General delivery

So if you want your freedom P.D.Q

Divorce me C.O.D

Now there's gonna come a day gal

When you'll be feelin' blue

You'll find that you can't pay your bills

With a little ole I.O.U

That dynamite you're messin' with

May be T.N.T

So if you want your freedom P.D.Q

Divorce me C.O.D

No need to fall

Down on your knees

'Cause I know all

My A.B.C.'s

I ain't no college 'fessor

Ain't got no Ph.D

But if you want your freedom P.D.Q

Divorce me C.O.D

No need to fall

Down on your knees

'Cause I know all

My A.B.C.'s

I ain't no college 'fessor

Ain't got no Ph.D

But if you want your freedom P.D.Q

Divorce me C.O.D