I've Never Seen a Straight Banana

You may have seen some funny things in your time

But there's one thing you've not seen, I'd like to bet.

Would you like to know just what you have been missing?

I'll tell you in the but not yet.

Now I've got you puzzled,

So I'll tell you what I mean.

The thing that's in my mind,

I must confess, I haven't seen.

I have never, never, never, never,

I've never seen a straight banana.

I guess I must admit

That I have searched quite a bit.

They're even curved when they are served in my banana split.

I have seen them by the car-load on the Delaware & Lacawana

But have you ever? No, I've never

I've never seen a straight banana.

I recall when I was in Alaska

I saw the sun at twelve-o'clock at night.

I've seen the waterfalls at old Niagara

I can vouch it is a most impressive sight.

But I'd like to see one certain thing

But if it's not to be,

I'd like to meet somebody else

Who saw what I can't see.

I've never, never, never, never seen a straight banana.

Although the things I hate,

Hundreds I have ate.

But I've never yet seen one banana that was straight.

I have traveled far to find one.

I've been to Chili and Havana.

But I've never, never, never,

I've never seen a straight banana.

I've never, never, never, never seen a straight banana.

Once I chanced to see a real life murder mystery

The jury found the prisoner guilty in the first degree.

All at once we heard the prisoner holler out,

"This is the truth, your honor,

I've never, never never, never

Never, never, never, never

I've never seen a straight banana.