We Know

Mr. Vice President

Mr. Madison

Senator Burr

What is this?

We have the check stubs from separate accounts

Almost a thousand dollars paid in different amounts

To a Mr. James Reynolds way back in 1791

Is that what you have

Are you done?

You are uniquely situated by virtue of your position

Though virtue is not a word I'd apply to this situation

To seek financial gain, you stray from your sacred mission

And the evidence suggests you engaged in speculation

An immigrant embezzling our government funds

I can almost see the headline, your career is done

I hope you saved some money for your daughter and son

Ya best gwan run back where ya come from

Ha! You don't even know what you're asking me to confess (confess)

You have nothing

I don't have to tell you anything at all

Unless (unless)

If I can prove that I never broke the law

Do you promise not to tell another soul what you saw?

No one else was in the room where it happened

Is that a yes?

Um... yes

"Dear sir, I hope this letter finds you in good health

And in a prosperous enough position to put wealth

In the pockets of people like me down on their luck

You see, that was my wife who you decided to—"

What

She courted me

Escorted me to bed

And when she had me in the corner

That's when Reynolds extorted me

For a sordid fee

I paid him quarterly

I may have mortally wounded my prospects

But my papers are orderly

As you can see, I kept a record of every check in my checking history

Check it again against your list and see consistency

I never spent a cent that wasn't mine

You sent the dogs after my scent, that's fine

Yes, I have reason for shame

But I have not committed treason and sullied my good name

As you can see, I have done nothing to provoke legal action