Canadian Idiot (Parody of "American Idiot" by Green Day)

Don't wanna be a Canadian idiot

Don't wanna be some beer-swillin' hockey nut

And do I look like some frostbitten hosehead?

I never learned my alphabet from A to Zed

They all live on doughnuts and moose meat

And they leave the house without packing heat

Never even bring their guns to the mall

And you know what else is too funny

Their stupid monopoly money

Can't take 'em seriously at all

Well, maple syrup and snow's what they export

They treat curling just like it's a real sport

They think their silly accent is so cute

Can't understand a thing they're 'talking aboot

Sure, they got their national healthcare

Cheaper meds, low crime rates and clean air

Then again, well, they've got Celine Dion

Eat their weight in Kraft macaroni

And dream of driving a Zamboni

All over Saskatchewan

Don't wanna be a Canadian idiot

Won't figure out their temperature in Celsius

See the map, they're hovering right over us

Tell you the truth, it makes me kinda nervous

Always hear the same kind of story

Break their nose and they'll just say sorry

Tell me what kind of freaks are that polite

It's gotta mean they're all up to something

So quick before they see it coming

Time for a pre-emptive strike