Albatross

For all the things that I carry with me, this is my albatross

My hell of memory, clings to my quivering shell and paralyzes

...it paralyzes me in the silence of night

Bathed in the gentle glow of muted lamplight

I find myself ensnared within labyrinthine

Within labyrinthine corridors

A twisted maze where torment and apathy intertwine

Here, I bear the weight of a leaden mantle draped upon

My weary shoulders

As I sit in the silent reverie

Echoes of choices made and roads untaken

Cascade through the tunnels of my mind

For all the reasons that plague through my sleep

Bound in undying loss on a bed of misery

Sheets woven from restless fabric

And suffocates

Smothering my calm in the silence of night

Close your eyes, close your eyes

And you'll never dream deeply if you never sleep

In exhaust you wake up

Every day in the shadows of your past

I've held on for so long

To so many empty promises

To reconcile a life of dust

I was given back so much

That was never enough

I'm longing to heal the pride of my father

I'm waiting to feel for my ailing mother

Screaming to mend irreparable wounds

Taking with me nothing to my tomb

(Taking nothing to my tomb)

Like before mother's womb

Will my entire life, my family, my shelter

Be taken by the apathetic faults of my lies?

Or will it a fickle hope of my redemption?

Stipulated, nurturing each seraphim of failure

Exhausted on the limbs of anxiety that smother me