Animal Magic

Professor?

Elemental, yes

No, do come in, lovely to see you

At last, a visitor, I'm pleased you've returned

I've secrets that you need to learn

Apologies you had to use complex directions

I'm currently avoiding arrest and detection

Expelled from the role of clubs and societies

Been told I lack sanity, even sobriety

So don't lie to me if you need to leave

I've seen the finest men that need to heave

And distribute their guts across my hallway floor

With disgust, so before we take our tour

Be sure, stay close, extra tight

Geoffrey, fetch our guest a pipe

And prepare the lab, you wretched tyke

Damn monkey butler, best get this right

Special guest tonight? You're completely certain?

Then step to the right as I draw back the curtain

Animal Magic

This is Animal Magic

Animal Magic

This is Animal Magic

Now you see it

The myriad wonders of nature it's true

Can be understood fully in my homemade zoo

By brain-swapping with my cranial cutter

I created my apish butler

Like any explorer, forging new boundaries

I found this astounding

Then took me an owl beak and wings

Grafted to a tortoise shell

And now my "Owl-toise" is doing quite well

No, my chim-pan-goat's not the prettiest of creatures

My donkey-peed has the silliest of features

My lobster-oos don't like their claws

And my bat-trats do fly into doors

But until you've heard the badger-mingo sing

Or fed a tiny fish to a baby marmo-quinn

My dear sir or madam you've never lived

It's an impressive gift, so treasure this

Animal Magic

This is Animal Magic

Animal Magic

This is Animal Magic

Hold for a second, I'm not joking

This cage should not be open

My cham-ee-lion might be hiding loose

Oh God, so's the stripy tiger goose

And yes they're stunning, and yes they're wanderers

But yes they're cunning, and they may come for us

If there's rumpus you're able to run, I trust

Geoffrey, fetch me my blunderbuss

Oh no, don't tell me you're using this mutiny

I just wanted unity, what will they do to me?

Trapped, beheaded, oddly sickened

They attached my head to the body of a chicken

Run for your life, they're on a mad stampede

Leaving me combined betwixt man and beast

So strange, so odd

In retrospect perhaps a mistake to play God