Is That Remarkable?

The one thing we can't have happen is for Floyd to lose hope

Floyd's starting to lose hope

Lose hope!

Lose hope!

What?

Excuse me, I didn't say Floyd's starting to lose hope exactly-

I want the Walla Walla Bugle

The Paducah Tribune

Is this the Mexicali Telegram?

You ready for the lowdown

The real straight poop?

Here comes the mother lode scoop

Ah

I want the Alamogordo Banner

The Boise Gazette

Get me the Bumblebee in Birmingham

You ready for the goods?

'Cause she's ready to pop

This is going over the top!

Cave City, comma, capital K, capital Y, February five

"Cave Victim Losing Hope"

According to Skeets Miller

Huh?

Comma

Collins is quickly

Slipping into a state of deep despair, period

Asking For Milk

The trapped man was heard to cry out, comma, quote (Crying Out)

"Get me out of here, comma (In Deep Despair)

Even if you have to tear my foot off!" (To Tear His)

Exclamation, close quote (Foot Off!)

Floyd is reported to be in a state of delirium (Losing Hope)

Conversing with cave crickets (And Crying Out)

And even begging them (In Deep Despair)

"To Hurry, Hurry!"

Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry

"Pull Me Out!"

Remarkable?

Wait

Is that remarkable enough?

If you report what you see

Is it incredible?

Woah!

I wonder what tomorrow will bring?

Lee, there's a fella just arrived from the People's Bank

And he's saying he wants to help us with our money trouble

Oh, God bless him, Janie!

Where is he?

God bless him

God bless him

The Collins family is deeply religious

Gimme the Lackawanna Pulpit

The Pierre Picayune

Is this the Tallahassee Democrat?

Sharpen that woody

'Cause here's the dope

Chock full of tragedy and hope

I'd like the Ponca City Sun

The Saginaw Globe

Put me through the Escanaba Finch

Grab a feather

And double dip

This bird is ready to rip

"Collins Family Waits And Prays"

Cave City, comma, capital K, capital Y, February six

"Nellie, Jane, Old Man Collins, Sitting On Log"

The picture of the old weathered farmer (The picture of)

And his bent backwoods wife (The weathered family)

Is a touching one, period (Is touching)

The virginal sister is a colorful (A virginal)

Example of the folkways and (And colorful)

Eccentricities of the hillbilly life, period (Example of the life)

Remarkably enough, comma

Although they live such simple lives, comma

The Collins family manages to own a car and even wear shoes

I'm freezing

Huh?

He's free!

What the-

Floyd Collins is free!

Hogwash!

Hell no!

Balderdash!

He's free!

Hooey!

But I was just with him and he's

Not free!

Skeets Miller

Celebrity Hack!

I wonder what tomorrow will bring?

Go on, you know you're yella!

Now listen, fella

This ain't no literary magazine

I only want the goodies

The mother lode scoop

I only wanna scoop

I only wanna scoop

I only wanna scoop the poop

Ooh

Scoop the poop

Scoop the poop