Wanted

♫

You know me though you've never been

To Waymore, Arkansas

I'm famous for killing slower men

That tried to beat me on the draw

The only crime I was ever guilty of

Was being better looking than the man

Whose pretty wife preferred my face to his

And looking back, I understand

He was the sheriff of Waymore County

His father was the judge

His sister was a spinster

And I didn't return her love

His brothers were all lawyers

Except the one who owned that dive

Where they hung the wanted poster

"Reward - Dead or Alive"

Oh no, oh no

Oh no, oh no

I'm guessing what you're thinking

"How'd that make you famous, Jack?"

Well, it's what happened to me after

When the fiction turned to fact

It's a funny thing how rumors flew

From that little bar

The bounty on me grew and grew

And men came from near and far

It started at a thousand

Climbed higher everyday

I gave up counting when I heard

They were carting gold in on a train

Them boys wanna claim that fortune

And bring the body in

Of the Devil of Waymore County

That turned a Christian girl to sin

Oh no, oh no

Oh no, oh no

Now, I know that I'm good lookin'

But mama never raised a fool

And Daddy made me practice daily

With his Army-issue Colt

See, what them fellas think they know

Could just about fill a paper cup—

Not only am I handsome

I'm the best there ever was

I laid 15 men to rest

Made 15 widows from their wives

Set 15 stones on 15 graves

Put 30 tears in 30 eyes

No more again I'll tip my hat

To blushing girls in gold

While that low-down, no-good sheriff

Sets to walk around this world

Oh no, oh no

Oh no, oh no

Yeah, the Devil of Waymore County—

The name's a curse, a haint, a hex

Damned by features pleasing to the eye

Of the fairer sex

Someday I'd like to thank that man

That give me that awful name

He set the world upon me

I'm apt to set his world in flame

So if you see me coming you

Just better step aside

Better men than you all took their shot

Better men have died

I hope them stories find that sheriff

Now that they've all come true

'Cuz that lawman's deal is done

And the devil gets what's due

Oh no, oh no

Oh no, oh no

♫