Letras
Hollywood is the glamour capital of the world. And since Saturday
Night is the time your favorite stars get together for those
Gay parties you read about, let's go back to last night and
See what's going on in Jack Benny's Beverly Hills mansion
Everyone sure seems to be having a good time, boss
Well certainly they're having a good time. When you
Give your guests good food, a big orchestra, and
The champagne flows like water, how can you miss?
Yeah
Well, close the window Rochester. We can't watch
Ronald Coleman's party all night. Big show-off
Close the window. Good. Now help me off this box
Yes, sir
You know, Rochester, I just can't understand it
What, boss?
Well, the Colemans and I are next-door neighbors. And when Ronnie
First moved in, I used to go to all his parties. But the last few
Years he's had a dozen big affairs, and I haven't received an
Invitation to a single one of them. What do you suppose it could be?
Maybe you lost your address
Yeah, yeah. Well come on, let's finish our game of gin rummy
Okay, it was your turn to throw a card
Yeah. Let's see now. First you discarded the 10 of clubs
Then the 3 of spades, the 6 of hearts, the jack of diamonds
The 8 of hearts, the 5 of spades... What's so funny?
It sure helps when you've got 'em written down
Look, you play your way and I'll play mine. I hate
To break up my hand, but this is the only safe card
I can give you. Here you are, the king of spades
Gin
Are you lucky. Deal 'em up again. Rochester, are you
Sure I didn't get an invitation to Coleman's party?
Positive
They must have sent me an invitation and it
Got lost in the mail. Excuse me a minute
What are you doing, boss?
I'm going to call the post office. I'm
Going to give them a piece of my mind
While you're at it, boss, tell them they
Didn't deliver the gas bill this month either
It's your play, Rochester. Gee, I got a pretty good hand this time
You'll need it
Why?
I got gin
Again? That's the most unusual... I'll get it. Hello?
Oh, hello, is this Mr. Benny?
Yes
Well this is Sherwood, Mr. Coleman's butler
Oh, Sherwood. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes
Well, Mr. Coleman was a trifle embarrassed to even broach
The subject at this late hour, but we're having a party here
I know, I know. 183 guests
Oh, I say, you've been on that box again
I'm such a devil, aren't I?
Well, at any rate, Mr. Coleman thought you might
Like to slip into your tuxedo and come over
Would I? I certainly, I certainly would
Sherwood. I'll be glad to come over
Good, and remember, you serve from the left and remove from the right
Now look, Sherwood, I'm not waiting on tables for Ronald Coleman
Or anyone else. So goodbye. Of all the nerve. They can keep
Their party. I'm just as happy here at home with you, Rochester
But boss, I'm going out tonight
Going out? Gee, I thought you were going to stay with me
I'd like to, but I made plans to take the night off
But Rochester, you were off last week
Oh boss, you're not counting Tuesday night, are you?
Why not?
That's when I had my appendix taken out
What's the difference? You didn't get home till 3 in
The morning. Whole night he wants for that. Well
If you want tonight off, you better get started then
Okay, I'm going upstairs and put a tie on
Everybody wants time off. Gee, what'll I do with myself all night?
Gee, this is going to be a boring
Evening. I don't know what... Hello?
Oh, hello Mr. Benny, this is Dennis
Oh, Dennis. What do you want, kid?
Nothing. Are you going to be home tonight?
Yes, why?
Well, I thought I might come over and visit you
Oh, wonderful, Dennis. Come on over
Okay. Don't go away. Goodbye
Goodbye
I'm ready to go, boss, but if you really mind staying alone...
It's alright, Rochester. Dennis just called
He's coming over to keep me company
That's nice of him
It sure is. Let's see, I wonder what I can serve them
Well, there's sandwich bread and some cold cuts in the refrigerator
Yeah, and Dennis has such a sweet tooth. Have we plenty of candy?
Oh yeah, we've got caramels, Tootsie
Rolls, licorice, and some O. Henry bars
Oh, good
Shall I put them in the machine?
No, no, I can do it. You run along
Okay. Good night, boss
So long, Rochester. Gee, it's nice of Dennis to want to
Spend the evening with me. We'll sit around, he'll talk
To me. Discuss his problems. Drive me nuts. Anyway, I'll
Be alone, so it'll be nice... Hmm, now who can that be?
Oh, hello Mr. Benny
Dennis! How'd you get here so fast?
I was next door at the Colemans' party
What?
I would have got here sooner, but I walked
Now look, Dennis, I'm in no mood for any silly...
Shh, not so loud. If they find out I'm with you, they
Might let... not let me back in.You might not have got
That line out either. Look, Dennis, why don't you go
Back to your party, and you can tell 'em from me that...
Come in!
Hi, Jack!
Why, Donzie! Come on in. What are you doing here, Don?
Well, Jack, you know, the little woman's out of town, so I just
Thought I'd drop by and see if you'd like to take in a movie with me
A movie? Gee, I'm glad you thought of it. That's a wonderful
Idea. I didn't have anything to do tonight. I haven't
Been to a movie in months. Maybe Dennis will go with us
Dennis? Where is he?
He's standing under your stomach. Dennis?
Please don't laugh, Don. I'm too young to die
Hey, Dennis, you wanna go to the movie with us?
Sure. What's playing?
Well, I was going to the Palisades Drive-In. They're
Showing that new English film there, "Murder in Piccadilly."
Oh, let's go there
And they've also got a surprise second feature
I hear they've had some great ones lately
Hey, I like that, two features. Gee, that sounds pretty good. I've
Never been to a drive-in. Come on, fellas, my car's in the driveway
Hey, I think we're getting near the drive-in theater
There's a cowboy picture at the Strand
Dennis, you'll go where we go. Gee, I hope we
Get in at the start of the picture, fellas
Oh, the theater's right in the next block
Yeah, there's the sign
Oh, turn here, Jack. You have to go up
This winding driveway to the box office
Gee, I've never been in a driveway before
Pull up to that man next to the booth
Jack. He'll give us our tickets
Well, congratulations. You made it
Huh?
Ever since you left the street, I've been biting my nails
Now, look, I don't want any cracks about my car
Oh, is that a car? I thought it was a
Flying saucer that made a bad landing
Never mind. How much for the ticket?
Two dollars and forty cents. That's eighty apiece
Here you are, mister. Here's a five dollar bill
Alrighty. Two-forty out of five. That leaves two-sixty. Here you are
Thank you. Come on, Jack, drive inside
Okay. Gee, it sure is crowded here in this drive-
In theater. I don't see any empty spaces
Well, why don't you follow that car in front of you?
Yeah, he seems to know where he's going
Okay
You're following the wrong car. That other one turned left
He did not. I'm doing the driving
Well, back from the grand tour, eh?
Who?
Jack, you went all the way out and around the theater
Nobody listens to me
Well, hang on. I'm going back in
Not so fast. That'll be two-forty, please
What are you talking about? We paid you once
Well, don't get so huffy. It was Patso's money
I don't care whose money it was. Instead of being so sarcastic
Why don't you tell the fellow where we can park and see the show?
Section H. Go there
All right
Well, Jack, I-I think I see a space in the next row
Yeah, better hurry before somebody else gets it
Okay. I'll get in there. It's a tight
Squeeze. Watch your side, Don. Here I go
Come on. Come on. Plenty of room over here
Watch it. To the right. To the right. To the right
Come on. Come on. Oh, hold it, hold it. Hold it, Jack
To the left! To the left! To the left!
You just said the right
To the left!
Now, make up your mind
Hey, you guys pipe down, will ya?
Huh?
To the right, to the right, to the left, to the left
Now, Herman, don't make a scene
Oh, but, Myrtle, you'd think they was docking the Queen Mary
Oh, look, hold it down a little
Fellas. Now, how am I on your side, Don?
Fine, Jack. A little more. A little
More. There, there, that's perfect
Now, let's all settle back and watch the movie
Gee, I don't like the angle from here
Well, what's wrong with it?
Well, the actor on the screen has a pointed head
You're looking in the mirror
Jack, I think we're a little too far to the side
Maybe we could get something more to the center
Look, I had enough trouble finding this
Space. I'm not moving, so forget it
I told you to pipe down. Now you woke the baby up
Oh, for goodness' sake
Quick, Herman, give her the milk
I can't. You made it too hot
Hold her, Herman
I'm holding her, I'm holding her!
Hey, listen, you told me to be quiet. Now
How about you practicing what you preach?
Look, you woke the baby up
All right, I'm sorry. I didn't intend to, and I apologize
We're all here to see a movie, so let's relax and enjoy ourselves
You wanna be friends?
Certainly
Okay, stick your hand out the window
All right, there
Ow!
You see, Myrtle? I told you the bottle was too hot
You got a lot of nerve. You burned my hand
Quiet! What do you wanna do? Wake the other kids?
The other kids?
Yeah, Billy, Tom, Ann, Susie, Dickie, and Irving, a light sleeper
And if they wake up, they'll disturb Katie
Alice, Melvin, Julius, and the twins
How many children have you got?
Who knows? It's dark in here.Jack: Now, come
On, baby, Daddy's got you. Now go to sleep
Robert: Oh. We had to come to a drive-in
Jack: I wanna hear the picture. Don, roll
Down your window and get the speaker, huh?
Don: Okay. Here, I'll just hang it over the window ledge here
Man 1: Oh, Abigail. Abigail, my darling
These moments with you are like a dream
Woman 1: Yes, Charles. I only live when
We're together. Oh, hold me closer
Man 1: Mmm, how I love you, Abigail, but these secret
Rendezvous... What if your husband catches us?
Woman 1: Oh, that's impossible. He's away for the weekend
Jack: Don, turn the speaker up a little
Don: It isn't on yet. That's the couple in the next car
Jack: Oh, oh. Oh, oh
Don: There, it's on now
Man 2: Well, Inspector, if I follow your thought, one of
The gentlemen in this very room is the fiendish ax killer
Jack: Hey, this is exciting
Jack 2: Yeah, Abigail's kissing him again
Jack: Watch the picture!
Man 3: Yes, we've got it, and you'll be astonished
When I tell you that the name of the murderer is...
Don: Jack! Jack, stop blowing your horn!
Jack: I'm not blowing it, it's stuck!
There must be a short in the wire
Jack 2: Gee, I can't hear who the murderer is
Don: Jack, everybody's hollering at us
We gotta do something! Do something, Jack!
Jack: I'm hitting it, it won't stop!
Jack 2: Call the automobile club!
Jack: I can't, they blackballed me
Don: Watch it, I'll call the wire! There!
Jack: Gee, I'm so embarrassed
Jack 2: You woke the baby up again, I hope you're satisfied!
Jack: Look, it was an accident. If you don't
Like being next to me, why don't you move?
Man 4: I should move
Jack: I should move! Did you hear that, Myrtle? This joint comes
In, bothers everybody, and he wants I should move! Of all the
. Quick, Myrtle, hold the baby! I'm afraid I'll throw her at him!
Don: Look, Jack, there's no sense staying here
Why don't you take that space over in the next row?
Jack: Oh, maybe you're right. Some people
Just won't let you have a good time
Don: Better go in here, Jack, next to this convertible
Jack: Oh, yeah, there's a spot there
There. Now maybe we can enjoy the picture
Man 5: Come closer, Cynthia. Your kisses do something to me
Woman 2: And yours thrill me, too. But Robert
I worry so. What if your wife catches us?
Man 5: Impossible. Abigail thinks I'm out of town for the weekend
Jack: Gee, the whole family's here. I wonder if
I should tell Abigail. Nah, why get involved?
Don: Look, look, they're about to start the surprise feature
Jack: Oh, good, the second feature. Hey, turn up the speaker, Don
Man 6: And now, ladies and gentlemen, the Palisades
Drive-In takes pleasure in presenting another in
Our Saturday night series of surprise features
Jack: Oh boy, I hope this is a good one
Man 6: Warner Brothers presents: The Horn Blows at Midnight
Jack: Well, what do you know! Hey, where's everybody going? Nobody
Stayed for the picture. Why, Don! Don, come back!
Dennis! The picture's not that bad. Abigail! Abigail!
Cynthia! And Lee! Leave the baby! Come back! I don't
Care, I'm gonna stay here and watch it all by myself
Man 7: Who's that?
Jack: It's me, Rochester
Man 7: Boss, you're home early. Didn't they
Have a second feature at the drive-in?
Jack: Yes, but most of the people left
Man 7: Well, that doesn't make any difference
They're supposed to show it anyway
Jack: I know, but in the middle of the third reel, the projectionist
Committed suicide. Goodnight, Rochester, I'm going to bed