Working at a Startup, Pt. 2

Look at the corner of my monitor its ten o clock

This stupid linter will not merge my code without a block

This stupid jenkins instance hangs on all my unit tests

I cannot sudo on the bastion host im only guest

A pair of chopsticks stuck in cold rice ive been eating

Since the sun set all my coworkers dont even think of leaving

This feature has a deadline finance needs it for the budget

The vice president of product just told QA they could suck it

Ive been wrestling with the codebase and its very buggy

Dude in charge of code review can barely get it running

I submitted twenty switches the compiler needs

To reduce the latency on all the hard drive write and reads

The database is sluggish tell devops to up the instance

And lets run it at a 2n so we maintain our persistence

Looks like a junior pushed their code changes to master

Now the repo needs a revert - can you people do this faster?

Argh

I cant wait until i work for a real company

With a working ci/cd pipeline

And a well-documented codebase

With some competent engineers

Is that really too much to ask for?

Does anyone here even know what theyre doing?

Why am i sniffing this dry erase marker?

I better acquire some adderall if i plan on getting this done

Let me @channel on slack before i pass out

This burnout is hella sickening

And my work life balance suffers greatly all my free time shifting

Have unlimited vacation but i never use it

Cause my team makes me feel guilty for not pushing through this (pushing through this)

Temple of aluminum - a pile sit to the side of my displays

And the design doc on my desk starting to look just like a maze

The code that we outsourced to india is looking flawed

And they used outdated libraries in go dep and go mod

The agile coordinator screaming bout her swim lane

Just found out her project moved to backlog so shes going insane

We agreed to none of this in todays standup

If you think we need a meta scrum please go and put your hand up

I bang my keyboard in frustration i lost all my patience

My containers building last according to the wait list

Its 1 am it doesnt look like ill escape

Working at a startup sucks theres way too much red tape