Macavity, the mystery cat
Macavity's a mystery cat
He's called the hidden paw
For he's the master criminal
Who can defy the law
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard
The flying squad's despair
But when they reach the scene of crime
Macavity's not there!
Macavity, Macavity
There's no one like Macavity
He's broken every human law
He breaks the law of gravity
His powers of levitation
Would make a fakir stare
And when you reach the scene of crime
Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement
You may look up in the air
But I tell you once and once again
Macavity's not there!
Macavity's a ginger cat
He's very tall and thin
You would know him if you saw him
For his eyes are sunken in
His brow is deeply lined with thought
His head is highly domed
His coat is dusty from neglect
His whiskers are uncombed
He sways his head from side to side
With movements like a snake
And when you think he's half asleep
He's always wide awake
Macavity, Macavity
There's no one like Macavity
For he's a fiend in feline shape
A monster of depravity
You may meet him in the by-street
You may see him in the square
But when a crime's discovered
Then Macavity's not there!
He's outwardly respectable
They say he cheats at cards
And his footprints are not found
In any file of Scotland Yard's
And when the larder's looted
Or the jewel case is rifled
Or when the milk is missing
Or another pig's been stifled
Or the greenhouse glass is broken
And the trellis past repair
Aye, there's the wonder of the thing
Macavity's not there!
And when the Foreign Office
Find a treaty's gone astray
Or the Admiralty lose some plans
And drawings by the way
There may be a scrap of paper
In the hall or on the stair
But it's useless to investigate
Macavity's not there!
And when the loss has been disclosed
The Secret Service say
"It must have been Macavity"
But he's a mile away!
You'll be sure to find him resting
Or a-licking of his thumbs
Or engaged in doing complicated
Long division sums
Macavity, Macavity
There's no one like Macavity
There never was a cat
Of such deceitfulness and suavity
He always has an alibi
And one or two to spare
At whatever time the deed took place
Macavity wasn't there!
And they say that all the cats
Whose wicked deeds are widely known
I might mention Mungojerrie
I might mention Griddlebone
Are nothing more than agents
For the cat who all the time
Just controls their operations
The Napoleon of crime!