twenty five & lost

I'm almost twenty-five, still sleeping on the floor

Still talking to my younger self like she knows more

I thought I'd have a map by now, a name, a plan

But all I've got are doubts I don't know how to understand

Everyone's moving forward

I'm stuck counting my scars

They're buying homes and wedding rings

I'm just learning who you are

I'm twenty-five and I feel lost

Like I missed the turn, like I paid the cost

For dreaming too big or not enough

For staying soft in a world so rough

If this is growing, why does it hurt?

Why does healing feel like it's worse?

I'm twenty-five and I don't know me

But I'm trying to be someone I can believe

I smile when they ask me, "How's life?"

Like I didn't cry in my car last night

I'm older now, but still afraid

That I peaked in the dreams I never chased

They say time is forgiving

But it's staring me down

Every birthday feels like a mirror

I don't recognize now

I'm twenty-five and I feel lost

Like I missed the turn, like I paid the cost

For dreaming too big or not enough

For staying soft in a world so rough

If this is growing, why does it hurt?

Why does healing feel like it's worse?

I'm twenty-five and I don't know me

But I'm trying to be someone I can believe

Maybe lost is just the space

Between who I was and who I'm meant to be

Maybe I don't need answers yet

Maybe surviving counts as progress

I'm twenty-five and I feel lost

But I'm still here, so I'm not lost

I'm still breathing, still in love

With the girl who won't give up

If this is growing, I'll stay brave

Even if it takes a million days

I'm twenty-five and I don't know me

But I'm becoming someone I can believe