Carrot

A farmer buys a donkey, he haggles down the price

The seller fella shrugs OK, but he offers this advice.

"Respect can't be demanded, it has to be inspired

A stick won't make that donkey work, it's a carrot that's required

Go the carrot, not the stick

Go the kiss, not the kick

Go the bicky, not the brick, go"

Well, that farmer doesn't listen and off to his farm does trudge

But when he hitches up his plough, the donkey just won't budge

That shonky donkey just won't budge

So he rants and raves and he beats the

beast, but there are hollers of dismay

As the farmer's youngest daughter tugs upon his pants to say

"Go the carrot..."

Say yes to positive, not no to negative

'Cause no to negative is not enough

Say yes to positive, not no to negative

Preposterously positive, that's the stuff

Well, that farmer pays no heed at all and a fracas does ensue

It's less than more than he bargained for and he says he's gunna sue

He's litigious through and through

But the donkey dealer on the phone laughs off that litigation

"You're a stubborn fool if you let that

mule out-stubborn you all day, son, go"

Now the daughter's found some carrots and the donkey well approves

He's got sparkling eyes and flapping ears and a twinkle in his hooves

A twinkle in his hooves

But the farmer bounds back full of beans for a refund's been agreed

So he'll never know he's letting go a

strong, speedy steed indeed, if he'd gone..."

Will that farmer ever get the point? Will his daughter try in vain?

Will the donkey find a new farm that makes carrots and champagne?

Never real pain again!

Respect can't be demanded, it has to be inspired

And what goes round becomes a round, so a choir is thus required, go.