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You've got your Volvo and your little old mortgage
All your things of value, they're all wrapped up in storage
You've got two front row children named Dick and Jane
They look like Ken and Barbie and you dress 'em both the same
You've got a dog named Rover, cat named Maggie
Your wife won't let you in the car if it gets a little foggy
I don't wanna be the one to say that you've got it boring
But your work could die at 6.30 a.m. every morning
This is an ode to slimy faceless
Guy who for now should remain nameless
But you could've been here with us
Could've been on this trip, yeah
Trade in your ticket for a pair of comfy slippers
You're in the same job till the day that you retire
You're happy to just sit at home with your feet up by the fire
It's okay to spend all of your Fridays down the pub
But you really should draw the line at joining a kind of club
You'd rather stay home and watch TV
Than come out and socialise with little old me
I don't wanna be the one to say that you've got it boring
But when you start talking, people start yawning
This is an ode to slimy faceless
Guy who for now should remain nameless
But you could've been here with us
Could've been on this trip, yeah
Trade in your ticket for a pair of comfy slippers
This is an ode to slimy faceless
A guy who for now should remain nameless
Wash and clean your car on every single Sunday morning
Still enjoy surprises, you just need a lot of warning
Go and play your golf game and improve your handicap
Then you sit down for a hearty meal and line up for a nap
Think the wife's been good, but she's hit on me instead
You wouldn't misunderstand her, you just listen what she said
I don't wanna be the one to say that you've got it boring
But you live and work and you probably
Die in the same town you were born in
This is an ode to slimy faceless
Guy who for now should remain nameless
But you could've been here with us
Could've been on this trip, yeah
Trade in your ticket for a pair of comfy slippers
This is an ode to slimy faceless
Guy who for now should remain nameless
Could've been here with us
Could've been on this trip, yeah
Trade in your ticket for a pair of comfy slippers