I Didnt Say I Was Sorry

I thought change would speak for me

I didnt know silence was louder

I changed my behavior not my nature

You wanted words I gave you later

I fixed patterns not emotions

Thought improvement was devotion

I stopped the shit that made you cry

Never named the reason why

I thought restraint was progress

Thought distance meant I grew

I didnt see how every fix

Still circled back to you

I moved different talked calmer

Didnt raise my tone

I thought being less destructive

Meant I was finally grown

I didnt want to relive the moment

Didnt want to sit in shame

So I acted like results

Could replace naming pain

You fixed everything but the hurt

I didnt hear an apology

You healed loud I healed alert

Silence dressed as growth to me

You moved on like it was easy

I stayed tense I stayed the same

You fixed yourself in front of me

But never fixed the blame

Healing dont erase damage

It just teach you how to manage

I needed accountability

Not advantages

You say look how far I came

I say look what you left

Progress dont replace regret

It dont give me breath

You never sat me down and said

I know I broke your trust

You just started acting better

Like that covered up enough

I wasnt asking for perfection

Just a moment of truth

I needed language for the pain

Not a better version of you

I didnt hear you say you sorry

I just watched you change

You rebuilt yourself around me

Left the wound the same

I didnt hear you say you sorry

You just rearranged

And the space where love was

Never felt the same

I was scared if I said it out loud

It would pull us back