I Just Can't Help Myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

There I go, here I go, where I go, I don't know

I just can't help myself

So why do I do what I do when I do?

Well I can't say so, or I just don't know

Boys will be boys is what I usually say

That's the how and the why that I act this way

That's the end of the line, I've run out of rhyme

That ain't a crime, so it's make it up time

Let's see, I know, it's some cosmic force

Causing my mind to go just way off course

To another dimension, not only of sight and sound

But of being a clown

Or an alley cat, or a dirty rat

Or a loud mouth brat, well I'm all that

So if you ask me why I'm always in such a mess

Well, ha, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

A very great lady once said it right

A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bite

Ha, there I go again, such a know-it-all

No friends at all 'cause I make them crawl

I can't help showing off all that I know

All the what's I can do, all the where's I can go

I know it makes the family very uptight

I know it isn't right but I do it every night

I probably don't belong here, I certainly feel wrong here

Every night I have a dream, more like a nightmare

I see myself being born, Mom and Dad are there

But it's not Marge and it's not Homer

Switched in the cradle, no wonder I'm a goner

I feel like a book that's on the wrong shelf

I know I shouldn't think it, but I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

Hey, you know, I kinda like this thing

It's sorta like music but you don't have to sing

It's got none of the work and all of the fun

Like a low-cal donut or a fat-free fun

By the way, that reminds me, how 'bout a snack?

Just a sub sandwich or a cold six-pack

A big bag of pork rinds, that couldn't hurt

Some cake for dessert to keep my mind alert

It takes a lot of energy to do this rap

I feel kinda sleepy, better take a nap

Not too long a nap, two hours, that's a winner

I wouldn't wanna sleep through a roast beef dinner

Roast beef with gravy and potatoes

Hot rolls and butter, lettuce and tomatoes

I know I shouldn't eat it, I gotta keep my health

But what the hey, I can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I can't help it, I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself

I just can't help myself