The Price of Peace

Hmm

Hey

Oh

Hey, mm

I didn't leave because I stopped lovin' them

I left because I started lovin' me

And peace don't always come free

Sometimes it costs everythin'

I used to shrink to keep the peace

Bend my tongue, held my breath

Let people stay in rooms with me

Who drained my spirit half to death

I was the glue, the listener

Then "You know she'll understand"

But nobody asked how I was

They just reached out for my hands

I kept forgivin' silence

Excusin' disrespect

Callin' it just how they are

While losin' pieces of myself

My peace cost me my people

But I ain't sorry for the bill

Had to lose some hearts I held

Just to learn how to be still

I cried for them in private

Even prayed they'd understand

But peace don't come from holdin' on

To people who don't hold your hand

They say you've changed, I say I healed

But healin' ain't a place

They could stand, so yes

My peace cost me my people

And that's the part they'll never understand, mm, yeah

Family felt entitled

Friends felt overdue

But nobody noticed what stayin', around them put me through

Every time I said, "Yes" when my soul whispered "No"

I traded my joy just so they wouldn't go

But peace got louder, and God got clear

He said, "If they can't grow with you then they can't stay near"

My peace cost me my people

But survival had a cost

I had to grieve the livin' like somebody I had lost

They still talk in circles

Still say I changed too much

But I don't miss the noise, I don't miss the clutch

I gave up chaos, I gave up pain

I gave up playin' roles in somebody else's game, so yeah

My peace cost me my people

But peace is how I kept my name, yeah, hey, name

I don't hate them, I just don't miss beggin' for love

I don't miss explainin' myself to folks who never heard me

I don't miss holdin' space, for people who never held space for me

My peace cost me my people

But I sleep better at night

I ain't arguin' with energy

That don't deserve my fight

If choosin' me feels selfish

Then I guess I finally chose right

'Cause I lost a crowd, but I found my light

So if you ask me was it worth the tears, the quiet the shift, yes

Because peace is finally somethin', I didn't have to beg to live with