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(What, MiSTah Kye mixed this on a phone?)
Yo bro
Yo, what you telling me, Kye
Nuin much bro, just been tryna get through to you
What? Through to me?
Oh shit, my bad bro, I ain't even been on my phone
How you been though?
Err, I been calm bro, what about you?
Chat to me
I've had PTSD for all of these years
I've struggled to sleep and anxiety that still hasn't gone now
Having convos in my head won't leave
I still ain't me, when will I ever get to be me?
Still can't sleep I will not sleep
It's more than music it's way too deep
PTSD still fucking with me
Can't sleep, it's peak, man bare with me
I'm losing my mind so I take Lucy
I been feeling a way so it's hard to speak
Pain in my mind when I'm with my team
But I'm keeping it G so I pray it's a dream
But it ain't no fucking dream
I'm tearing apart, man, I need to scream
Why's my mind just screaming at me?
"Kill yourself" but I know I can't leave
My whole family's depending on me, I mean
Wanna do it for family, I've seen
Everything I can't speak, won't preach, can't preach
Everything is on me, I've been
Overseas with my G's with good memories, I just want it to freeze
Anxiety is killing me now
I'm still anxious, it's beating me down
My brain can't stop, it's turning around
"Did you hear that noise?" "Nah" "Wait, how?"
Gun to my head, grr bow
"Wait, that sound, did you hear that now?"
"Bro don't do it, and put the gun down"
"Why? 'Cause everything will be fine"
MK, look, you really wanna help him
But deep down you can't help yourself
Gun on my lap while I'm on the phone
And bro don't know I was thinking the same
'Cause of all of the times I got hit in the past
Like a shooting range
MK vs Kye in a mental game
Tryna stop myself from going insane
Look I've had PTSD for all of these years
I've struggled to sleep and anxiety that still hasn't gone now
Having convos in my head won't leave
I still ain't me, when will I ever get to be me?
Still can't sleep, I will not sleep
It's more than music it's way too deep
PTSD still fucking with me
Can't sleep, it's peak, man bare with me
I'm losing my mind so I take Lucy
I been feeling a way so it's hard to speak
Pain in my mind when I'm with my team
But I'm keeping it G so I pray it's a dream
But it ain't no fucking dream
I'm tearing apart, man, I need to scream
Man, I still got voices up in my mind
But they're talking shit, tryna get me to crash out
Drugs to cope but I hope one day I can change, someday I hope that I can back out
We had similar pain back then, nowadays same thing so I'm writing a track down
In the party I'm wearing my hat down
Power cut in my mind like blackout
PTSD been walking for free
It don't really wanna see me win nominees
It don't want me to breathe and cry on my knees
Crying out please, just put me to sleep
Shotgun sneeze on my head, I'ma squeeze
I'm high off promethazine, walk back in my life like "Where have you been?"
MDMA keeping me happy, I see
PTSD be fucking with me
Real shit, coulda quit but I keep it moving
All the times I was losing, abusing the things that I shouldn't be using
My friendships fade but you're still here rooting
Hella times that I sat there wounded, stupid, stupid, I felt so stupid
Put the gun down, no point in shooting
I've had PTSD for all of these years
I've struggled to sleep and anxiety that still hasn't gone now
Having convos in my head won't leave
I still ain't me, when will I ever get to be me?
Still can't sleep, I will not sleep
It's more than music it's way too deep
PTSD still fucking with me
Can't sleep, it's peak, man bare with me
I'm losing my mind so I take Lucy
I been feeling a way so it's hard to speak
Pain in my mind when I'm with my team
But I'm keeping it G so I pray it's a dream
But it ain't no fucking dream
I'm tearing apart, man, I need to scream