My Hometown (BFS version)

This song goes out to my good friends

Especially the ones I had

Before the Grammy Nominations of 2003

And to all the girls from back in high school

Who actually spoke to me

Even though I was a fat kid and a marching band geek

I hope this song finds you well

And I hope that you're doing fucking swell

I hope that you're back up if you've ever been down

And I hope you got the fuck out of our hometown

Here comes a shout-out to the professor

Who said, "Son, pick a path and stay the same

Because charisma is the key to opportunity,"

And to all the clubs that let us play

To our family and friends at the music stores

For giving us gear when we couldn't pay

I hope this song finds you well

And I hope that you're doing fucking swell

I hope that you're back up if you've ever been down

And I hope you got the fuck out of our hometown

You know, I can't count how many times I've heard people say

"Be proud of where you're from, you're gonna put us on the map,"

But where the hell were you back in the day?

No one came to see us so we got the hell out of there

So there you have it

T-t-t-t-t-t-t-this song goes out to my big brother

For putting up with me following you around

And for making me smile when things at home weren't great

And for not getting pissed when I humped your girlfriend

For letting me take your car to the prom

For beating up the guys that hung my bike in a tree

For hand-me-down albums and guitar with no strings

And for never beating the shit out of me

I hope this song finds you well

And I hope that you're doing fucking swell

I hope that you're back up, 'cause I know you've been down

I just wish you'd get the fuck out of our hometown

I hope you get the fuck out of our hometown

I'm so glad I got the fuck out of our hometown

You know what I'm talking about, don't you?

Dammit!