It's Me Again, Margaret

Well, there once was a fella named Willard McBane

And he only had just one thought on his brain

Every evening about midnight, he'd slip off alone

And call the same lady on a pay telephone

"It's me again, Margaret

Hello, is this Margaret?

You don't know me, Margaret

But I know you"

Well, this upset the lady and it gave her the blues

So she called up the police, said, "What shall I do?"

Well, the chief of detectives came 'round to her home

And eavesdropped upon them on her upstairs phone

"It's me again, Margaret

Hello, is this Margaret?

I know it's you, Margaret

Are you naked?"

Well, they called up ma bell and they traced him on down

To a funky old phone booth on the outskirts of town

It was there that the vice squad with their field glasses read

Lips of that amorous man as he said

"It's me again, Margaret

Hello? Is this Margaret?

I know it's you, Margaret

Wanna hear me bark like ren ten ten"

Well, they cuffed him and dragged him to the station downtown

And they allowed him one phone call 'fore the jailer came 'round

He wet his chapped lips and he cleared his young throat

Then he dialed the telephone and softly, he spoke

"It's me again, Margaret

They got me, Margaret

You ain't gon' miss me, Margaret, I know that

But I'll miss you

And when I get out, Margaret

I'm going to come over there with a weed-eater

And a live chicken, and some cool whip

We'll have a big old time, Margaret!"

Why, yes, ma'am, you can post bond right over here

Mr. McBang, please

That'd be 350 dollars

And, uh, how much for those handcuffs?