why did i fail

It's not like before

I left and regret it

When you shut the door

I tried to accept it

And let it heal with time it's all I've got

Told everyone I'm fine or so I thought

Days turn to weeks

And weeks into seasons

The sunlight retreats

I'm still here not sleeping

I tell myself I'll leave it in the past

It's really not too bad

But under all of that

I miss you

So why did I fail

You said what we had was so real

I'm searching for closure

All the nights in your bed

On a loop in my head

Over and over again

So how did we fall

Was it timing or me after all

Cause it's all consuming

Each word that you said

Living on in my head

Over and over again

So why did I fail

I've still got your books

You said I should keep them

Reminds me of you

Small talks in the evening

I fixate on the habits that I lost

And pick apart my actions to a fault

But I promise

I'm actively

Trying to get through

To get to the scene

Where I finally forget you

The movies we watched

They're ending like us

And it feels like I'm fine until

I miss you

So why did I fail

You said what we had was so real

I'm searching for closure

All the nights in your bed

On a loop in my head

Over and over again

So how did we fall

Was it timing or me after all

Cause it's all consuming

Each word that you said

Living on in my head

Over and over again

So why did I fail