If You Open Your Mind Too Much Your Brain Will Fall Out (Take My Wife) (Live)

If anyone can show me one example in the history of the world

Of a single psychic who has been able to prove

Under reasonable experimental conditions

That they are able to read minds

And if anyone can show me one example in the history of the world

Of a single astrologer who has been able to prove

Under reasonable experimental conditions

That they can predict future human events by interpreting celestial signs

And if anyone can show me one example in the history of the world

Of a single Homoeopathic Practitioner who has been able to prove

Under reasonable experimental conditions

That solutions made up of infinitely tiny particles of good stuff

Dissolved repeatedly into relatively huge quantities of water

Has a consistently higher medicinal value

Than a similarly administered placebo

And if anyone can show me one example in the history of the world

Of a single spiritual person who has been able to show

Either empirically or logically the existence of a higher power

With has any consciousness or interest in the human race or ability to

Punish or reward humans for there moral choices or that there is any

Reason other than fear to believe in any version of an afterlife