Calling Professor Longhair

He was playing on his old piano

A little New Orleans, outside the snow was falling

Two months to Mardi Gras, it's seventeen in Buffalo

Professor Longhair, can't you hear me calling?

I've been so sick and sad

I miss my mom, I lost my dad

My life's a soap opera, it's so apalling

I wanna drive and drink, don't like the thoughts that I think

Professor Longhair, can't you hear me calling?

Maybe there's a place where I can go

Somewhere to make it all make sense

I'll find to feed the dogs

And jump the fence

Doing t'ai chi in the morning

Doesn't seem to help me

I wanna dance but I'm not fit for crawling

I've been so lonely lately, even waitresses won't date me

Professor Longhair, can't you hear me calling?

I'm out of cigarettes

Oh God, I love tobacco

Can't get out of the car cause the engine's stalling

Need sex and sympathy, the moonlight on the meadow

Professor Longhair, can't you hear me calling?