Captain Kirk vs Christopher Columbus

Arrivederci

I'mma leave before this battle begins

Cause we both know in the end which of these captains gonna win

I'll show you how a real explorer handles a situation

I'll beat you so bad they'll feel it in the next generation

So bring it on

I'll whip you like a Klingon

My rhymes will burrow in your ears like The Wrath of Khan

I've got a neck chop for Spock I'll put my sword through Sulu

Check into a Priceline Hotel and watch your fat ass on Hulu

I'm the enterprising Captain James Tiberius Kirk

Representing Riverside Iowa, planet Earth

I hear you call yourself an explorer

But I'm just not having it

You discovered a new world that was already inhabited

Why don't you boldly go someplace you've never gone before like India

Or any destination you actually set sail for

You spaghetti eating fuck

How's your spice rack doing?

I'll be chilling in my spaceship

Have fun canoeing

You know rapping against you it's not even fun

It's like somebody set your brains on stun

I am the fabric of history, you are a fictional stain

I'll stick a flag up your ass and claim you for Spain!

Mr. Spock beam me back to 1492 so I can beat this man like it's my job

We'll see how Isabella likes my Captain's log

It's Kobayashi for you, there's no way you could win

When your weak crew sees me approaching

They'll be like, dammit it's Jim

I'll double-fist-punch you, you slave making bitch!

Now, take your genocidal ass off of my bridge