narc (i'm so happy that you're dead)

I'm so happy that you're dead even though you aren't yet

I have killed you in my head, and I ain't feeling no regret

You messed with my brain all these goddamn years

Now I'm smothered by the tears, all my anxieties and fears

Yeah

I'm stuck picking through all the emotional remains

All the memories torn out 'n' left on hanging in the frames

Oh, you love hurting people, you love tearing them down

You're such an intricate gaslighter and you wear it like a crown

You don't question yourself - others get all the blame

In your brain the human race exists to serve for your gain

Never said sorry never backed down

Never doubted never questioned never thought

You could be wrong in what you've done

Come on tell me I'm insane

Well it's entirely your game

I've been maimed, restrained, ashamed of bearing my name

Come on tell me I'm to blame - yeah, right, сука

I am guilty that I stuck with you for longer than I shoulda

Psychological abuse can hurt as bad as physical

When inflicted day by day the damage can be unbelievable

I've been listed all conditions to the unconditional

Asked permissions, felt deficient, taking space was criminal

My life's a mess, yes, I'm blaming you for this stress

Can never rest always depressed

Years spent obsessed with proving to you I'm the best

I was part of your plan, not a soul you raised

Just a face on the picture, a façade to be praised

A trophy on your shelf, for the world to see

But you never gave a damn about the real me

Ticked the box off your list that you called 'family made'

Then you got pissed that I exist when the effort didn't trade

Every win I ever had, you always brushed it aside

Like nothing I could ever gain would ever leave you satisfied

All I wanted was to make you proud

But your silence - hit harder than you yelling out loud

Your claim for excellence left me feeling worthless

Your questioning my actions made me permanently nervous

Know this -