My Handy Man Ain't Handy No More

Now whoever said a good man is hard to find

Positively absolutely sure was blind

Cause I just found the best man that ever was

And here's just a few of the things that he does.

He shakes my ashes,

Greases my griddle,

Churns my butter,

And he strokes my fiddle,

My man, is such a handy man.

Now he threads my needle,

And he creams my wheat,

Heats my heater,

And he chops my meat (he's a mess),

My man, is such a handy man.

Now I don't care if you believe it or not,

He's a mighty nice man to have around,

Cause when my furnace gets too hot,

He's right there to turn my damper down,

For everything, that man of mine's got a scheme

And honey it's amazing the way he handles my machine

My man, is such a handyman (oh that man is a mess).

He flaps my flapjacks,

Cleans off the table,

Feeds the horses in my stable,

My man, is such a handyman.

And do you know, sometimes he's up way before dawn,

Busy cleaning the rough edges off my lawn,

My man, is such a handyman.

Now, he never has a single word to say,

While he's working hard (poor soul),

And I'd give anything if you could see the way,

he handles my front yard.

Now my ice never gets a chance to melt away,

Cause he sees that I get a nice fresh piece everyday,

My man, is such a handyman.