Did I Ever

The room is quiet but my head's too loud

Every wall still knows your sound

I trace your name in the steam on glass

Like if I wait, you might come back

I learned the weight of an almost

Learned how hope can bruise

You don't disappear at once

You just slowly lose

I don't miss the fights or the late-night cries

I miss the way you said my name like it meant I'd survive

I'm still breathing, so I guess I'm alive

But living feels different on this side

I don't need you to save my soul

I just need to know

Did I ever feel like home?

Did i ever

I see your face in strangers' eyes

In borrowed laughs, in passing time

Every love song feels like theft

Like they're stealing what we left

And maybe losing you

Is where I lost myself

Or maybe losing you

Is how I learned who I am

I don't miss the chaos, I don't miss the pain

I miss the silence when you stayed

I'm still breathing, so I guess I'm alive

But living feels different on this side

I don't need you to save my soul

I just need to know

Did I ever feel like home?

Like home?

Did i ever

If love is a fire

Then we burned too fast

If this is the ending

Why does it last?

I'm learning how to let go slow

Without pretending I don't know

Say my name

Even if it's only in your head

Say my name

So I know we weren't just dead

Say my name

I'm still breathing, yeah I'm still here

Carrying the weight of every year

I don't need you to come back home

I just need to know

I wasn't alone

Did I ever feel like home?

Say my name