How to Beat a Monkey at Chess

This piece takes that piece, but that piece then takes mine

I can't lose my rook while I'm lagging way behind

I'll play safe and wait for an opportunity

I won't let that cheeky monkey make a monkey out of me

Wait, Mark, don't take it, that monkey's set a trap

He wants me to take it? He thinks you're quite a sap

But check out, this bishop, you'll take his piece for free

And the monkey's got no chance to make a monkey out of me

Let's set a gambit, we'll take him by surprise

Not really an option, he took, like, half my guys

Let's bring in the big guns and force his king to flee

So, that monkey doesn't further make a monkey out of me

One of these pieces has got to do the trick

But how can we beat him? I'd recommend a stick

It's crazy, bananas, insane, completely nuts

But I think we made a monkey out of

Completely made a monkey out of

We finally didn't let a monkey make a monkey out of us