The Room We Built a Dream In

Oh, I spent years tryin' to erase all of the good times

So I'd be happy without you

And I can see the timeline where I love you for a lifetime

I'm cryin' in the kitchen cause I burned our dinner again

You say everything's still perfect but there's some strange kind of aftertaste

I let it all go to waste and you're saving every paper receipt

It's a trail that I keep followin' I guess I'm still wandering

Back home to you

Remember when I scraped my knee?

You came and picked me up

I bled on the upholstery

You said it's all just stuff

It can be replaced

Can I crawl back

Into our queen bed

And feel like royalty again

In a one bathroom apartment

Where nothing ever worked right

And even you and me

Are strugglin' to keep the lights on

But it's brighter than any city skyline

I keep drivin' into

Trying to forget you

I wonder if it's all still there

They keep bulldozing forests to build neighborhoods

Turning up the wild flowers

Where we looked at stars for hours

Stringin' brand new cell towers

We're barely holdin' on

To connection

Now I'm washin' all the dishes by hand

And beggin' you to touch me

While you fed all your fantasies

I survived on almost nothin'

Starving in the bathroom here

Agonizing over halfway eatin' bowls of cereal callin' straight to voicemail

Jumping at the sound of the door and sleepin' like a stray dog

You remember every now and then i remember it

Oh, I remember it

And I've seen a dozen therapists

Looking for a cure to this

An antidote or label that will

Bring me back to stable

And clear out the delusion i keep fallin' for

That you'll want me more, that I can make it work

Now my life is full, but the memory of empty seems to linger

You're the left side of the bed

And the space between my fingers

I can go anywhere I want

Except the room we built a dream in

You told me you were leavin'

But I've been gone for ages

I took all the clothes I could fit

Inside a couple suitcases

Then a stranger came and cleared out all the rest

At least most of it

For whatever was left

I met a man who told me I can learn

To live around it

That it doesn't get smaller but life gets bigger

Oh and I wanna believe that's true

I think I spent the best and worst of me on you

I wish that I could hate you

But you chased away my demons before I could even name them

And you loved me in no makeup and your sweatshirt frayin' at the edges

If anything it's how you liked me best

Now my life is full but the memory of empty seems to linger