Trap 3 Little Pigs

So I chased that pig down

Wanted some bacon, so I had to go to his big brother's house

And I blew that thing down

Little Red Riding Hood didn't ride home, so I'm after you now

I'm a real alpha wolf, this ain't Winnie-the-Pooh

Don't try and cry "wolf", I'm not lying to you

My McDonald's money is low, so you'll do

And I've got the right shoes, so it's over for you

Come here little pigs, I need my two-course meal

This is a fairytale, but I'm for real

I had Mary's little lamb, but a wolf's hungry still

I need food that will fill

I need some bacon!

I need some fries!

I need some pork with some pie on the side!

I need some sausage with beans and some rice!

I need that candlelit dinner tonight!

Pig told the wolf, "Oh, you're tripping for real

I'm way too cute for a snack, I'm a meal

We came from the mud, we've had worse wolves we've beat

Yes, we're pigs, but you don't want this beef!"

You know what little pig, I'm tired, I'm not here to play

If I don't bring dinner, I won't have a bae

You don't even follow me back on the 'Gram

So don't think you can beat me, I'm about to go ham!

Lucky for them, I had tripped on a stick

So they made it to their brother's house made of brick

Wolf came up after and saw the little pigs

He came to the pigs' door, and then the wolf said

"Little pig, little pig, let me in"

"Not by the hairs on my chinny chin chin"

So I huffed and I puffed, trying to blow that thing down

But that house was of brick, and it stayed in the ground

So I blew even harder, a real wolf won't quit

No I'm not chief, but I swear this is it

And I would have had that pig's house blown into bits

But my asthma was acting up, I had to sit

Lucky for me, a wolf got his degree

So I made up a plan to get all the piggies

They'll think I'm beat, and I'll fake a retreat

Then, I'll jump on the roof and right down the chimney

One pig said, "He stopped blowing his hot breath"

They heard footsteps and knew what was next

So they played their mixtape, got the fireplace lit

Then they waited for Wolf to come in

Pigs, I'm coming down the chimney, about to fatten up like Santa Claus

Ah! Okay, the chimney's feeling kind of hot!

All of you are lucky I'm going vegan

Just wait 'til me and my pack come back again

The end

JTK