Lifeboats

I just want to feel alive,

And love myself from the in and the outside.

'Cause every time that I start to feel whole,

I knock myself on the ground because it's all that I've known.

Just like the streets burn a hole through your shoe.

My soul has been worn out too,

I'm twenty-five and I still don't fit in,

Directionless like a blind man painting.

Mother, I'm so sorry,

I can't go on like this.

The lifeboats are leaving with or without me.

What's the point of falling in love,

If I don't love myself?

What's the point of being alive,

If all I want is out?

So I thought that it only feels right

To make decisions that danger my mind.

Late, late at night under black and blue moon,

I question the reasons that I self-abuse.

I'm so pathetic, it makes me sick.

I'm a fingerless pianist.

I see reflections, I clench my fist.

I'm a violin without the strings.

Mother, I'm so sorry,

I can't go on like this.

The lifeboats are leaving with or without me.

What's the point of falling in love,

If I don't love myself?

What's the point of being alive,

If all I want is out?

There is no love, there's only this.

Just lust and lies and selfishness.

A black hole where the sun once was.

I'm never falling back in love

Because it has never been enough.

Ever since I've been a young boy, I was alone,

Now that I've become a man, the feelings grown.

Through therapy, and through the pills, I can't let go.

But what about the fucking fact I'm still alone?

What do you do when you've got nothing left?

Give up, give up, and hope for the best.

I fell into the ocean eye, and I feel sick,

Waiting on a nameless rescue ship

What do you do when you've got nothing left?

Give up, give up, and hope for the best.

I fell into the ocean eye, and I feel sick,

Waiting on a nameless rescue ship

Mother, I'm so sorry,

I can't go on like this.

The lifeboats are leaving with or without me.

What's the point of falling in love,

If I don't love myself?

What's the point of being alive,

If all I want is out?