ABANDONMENT ISSUES

I got abandonment issues that's why I keep my distance tight

Everybody say they love you till you break then they take flight

People swear they'll never leave but I been left my whole life

So every time I feel too close I push before you cut the ties

I been raised by empty rooms broken trust and slammed doors

I learned early I'll be there usually means not anymore

Everybody that I leaned on disappeared when life got sore

Now I walk around like I don't need nobody anymore

I got darkness in my spine from every hand that let me fall

You said you'd catch me through the pain but you ain't catch me at all

Funny how you ghosted me the second I grew small

But now you blowin' up my phone since I been standin' tall

You ain't love me I was just your temporary bandage

Used me for your storms then dipped once you could manage

Had me feelin' worthless heart bruised and damaged

Now I treat your forevers like a lie in every language

I got abandonment issues yeah they wired in my chest

Every time I open up it feel like Russian roulette

People swear they loyal till they get bored or upset

Then they vanish from your life like you ain't someone they met

I ain't heartless I just know how people switch fast

One minute you their everything the next you just their past

You warned you'd never leave but then you dipped without a ask

Now I keep my circle smaller than the space inside my past

I hate the way I flinch when people show me real affection

Hate the way I brace for loss like it's my natural direction

Hate the way I love too hard and end up needin' resurrection

I got scars where other kids should've had protection

But I turn pain to pressure pressure turn me to a threat

Turn abandonment to anger anger turned me to the best

All the nights I cried alone became the fuel inside my chest

Now I'm everything they left and everything they still regret

I got abandonment issues but I ain't ashamed of that

Hell it made me sharper than the blade that hit my back

Made me trust a little less made my loyalty exact

If you walk up out my life once don't ever circle back

I'm built from all the silence that nobody ever filled

Built from all the promises that time just couldn't build

Built from all the moments where I begged to just be still

Now I'm colder than the world that taught me pain is how you heal

I got abandonment issues but I'm done losin' sleep

If nobody stayed for me then I'll stay for me at least

I ain't chasin' your closure I ain't beggin' you for peace

You left me in the dark

Crazy how I still turned out a beast