Australian Table Wine

Good evening! For the first time, on record

A 29 part adoptation of King Solomon's

Mines - Wines, sorry

Wines - King Solomon's Wines

A lot of people in this country pooh-pooh

Australian table wines this is a

Pity, as many fine Australian wines appeal

Not only to the Australian palette

But also to the cognoscenti of Great Britain

"Black Stump Bordeaux" is rightly praised

As a peppermint flavoured Burgundy

Whilst a good "Sydney Syrup" can rank with

Any of the world's best sugary wines

"Chateau Bleu", too, has won many prizes

Not least for it's taste

And it's lingering afterburn

"Old Smokey, 1968" has been compared

Favourably to a Welsh claret

Whilst the Australian

Wino society thouroughly recommends

A 1970 "Coq

Du Rod Laver", which, believe me

Has a kick on it like a

Mule: 8 bottles of this, and

You're really finished - at the opening

Of the Sydney Bridge Club

They were fishing them out of the

Main sewers every half an hour

Of the sparkling wines

The most famous is "Perth Pink"

This is a bottle with a message in

And the message is BEWARE! this is

Not a wine for drinking

- this is a wine for laying down and avoiding

Another good fighting wine is "Melbourne

Old-and-Yellow", which is particularly heavy

And should be used only

For hand-to hand combat

Quite the reverse is true of "Chateau

Chunder", which is an appellation controle

Specially grown for those keen on

Regurgitation - a fine wine

Which really opens up the

Sluices at both ends

Real emetic fans will also go

For a "Hobart Muddy", and a

Prize winning "Cuiver Reserve Chateau Bottled

Nuit San Wogga Wogga"

Which has a bouquet like an aborigine armpit