Flu Ride

Just hear those noses sniffilin', sore throats ticklin' too

C'mon it's lousy weather to be sufferin' inside with the flu

Outside the snow is fallin', your fever's at 102

Let's take some Alka-Seltzer and a box of antihistamines too

We'll bring some Kleenex with us and sing a chorus or two

Let's let my red nose lead us in a sleigh ride in spite of the flu

Hack it up, hack it up, lung it up, let's go

Phlegm chunks in the snow

We're coughin' up a yellow and green rainbow

Cough it up, cough it up, cough it up, oh man

There's some on my hand

My glands are puffed and swollen and every hour I pee

My throat's as rough as leather and raspy as it can be

Let's take some Kleenex with us and sing a carol or two

We'll make our noses redder on a sleigh ride to go with the flu

My kid came home from preschool with a cough today

He'll infect the whole darn neighborhood in about a day

We'll be callin' in sick to work until the diarrhea stops

At the pharmacy we'll get lots more pills to pop

Pop pop pop

I took every medication I can legally buy

For the coughing, sneezing, sniffling and the watery eyes

I'll be getting real drunk on Nyquil, I'll take Contact till I'm high

This wonderful buzz is great but I'm glad I don't have to drive

Just hear those noses snifflin', sore throats ticklin' too

C'mon it's lousy weather to be sufferin' inside with the flu

Outside the snow is fallin', your fever's at 102

C'mon it's lousy weather for a flu ride together with you