Good evening, friends and neighbors
Or shall I say, "This afternoon"
It would behoove me, audaciously
At this juncture in our compilation
To officially declare this congregation
The single largest amalgamation
Of any one particular nation's population
To ever receive an invitation
To a situation of such enduring magnitude
Forthwith and notwithstanding
Any misunderstood grandstanding
As it would pertain to the expansion
Of our national tantrum
In such a grand and/or irrational fashion
That I would implore you to explore
A more tangible interpretation of our national anthem
The likes of which we could plausibly take platinum
If you would turn with me in your hymnals
To the book of verbatim
Abatherations ad nauseatum
Ain't that some bullshit?
Ain't that some bullshit?
Ain't that some bullshit?
Ain't that some bullshit?
When you allow good men
To die for your freedom
Only later to recall them
As having fought for your flag
That's some bullshit
Henceforth, fourscore
And way too many more years before
The last first responder ever
Forgot to remember 7/11
Untoward a more perfect reunion
Of our most effervescent endeavor
To linger here forever
With or without the express written consent
Of any nationally-resented softball league's
Best politically-motivated
Preconditioned intentions
To lure your children
Away from these lives of crime
That they are leading out on the streets
And lead them to lives of crime
That would be taking place indoors
Lives of collusion
The likes of which this world has never seen before
Depending on what your definition of the word "is" is
Ain't that some bullshit?
Ain't that some bullshit?
Ain't that some bullshit?
Ain't that some bullshit?
I say, "Read my lips
And I'll show you my taxes"
And by that I meant to say that
If I am elected
I never said any of that shit