Here on the water
No harm could come to me
But a revolver was left on my table by somebody
"Just in case," they said nonchalantly
Which was fine at the time
But now the words haunt me
Sitting there loaded
The air is electric
Distracting
My thoughts are destructive and hectic
It reminds me of crimes I haven't committed
I feel guilty of having done something I didn't
I'm terrified but for some reason I'm smiling
The weapon reduces me but also seduces me
I've never known violence and there's none in my plans
I've not even once held a gun in my hands
At least not before now
As I sweat and I shiver
I point it out the window and aim it at the river
I feel so uneasy and sick from within
As if I might kill one of the suicides again
Dark impulse proposed and my finger accepted
The shot came quicker than I had expected
The river just swallowed it and nobody noticed
From the bridge or the pier, not in the remotest
How easily a crime could be committed here
It looks like the moon is stuck up a tree
And I'm in the mood for a nice cup of tea