Let me have it

I'll say things are OK

And you'll leave it alone

You can't see beyond your lens

And you don't ever try

Feel myself in your archives

Dissolved into dust

Brushed off of the edges

None of it was enough

I painted pretty pictures

Romcoms on my couch

And now the whole thing is gone

Nothing is the same

Everything has changed

Nothing is the time

How long till you feel guilty

Wonder what you did wrong

Wonder what you could've done better

If the wondering comes at all

Don't see the error now

Only the blind-happy paths of your love

Don't consider the casualties

Former iterations of us

All the trails lit by sun

That I no longer see

Thought this would define a lifetime

Carried on through the years

But you gave it away to chase a feeling

This grief is all that's left

So let me have it

Cuz you weren't there when I needed you

Had to give up on the thing I thought would keep me afloat

Had to let go of the person I thought grounded me most

With my eyes closed it still feels like love

When I can't see the vacancy between us

Thought this would define a lifetime

Carried on through the years

But you gave it away to chase a feeling

This grief is all that's left

So let me have it

Cuz you weren't there when I needed you