Текст пісні
Sleeping deep beneath the sleepers of the isle
There's a demon creature dreaming, heathen and reviled
Sees no rhyme or reason but for feasting when he's riled
Better let him be, lest you are sure to see the smile
Of 16 tons of scurrying death
Smoldering souls through funnel of red
With a pick-like grin on the front of his head
Sat atop a most illogical number of legs
Tickets, please, let me tell you the tale
Of a wicked beast, that'll follow your trail
Through the valleys and vales, on your tail day and night
There'll be chaos on the rails when the railway strikes
Stop, take stock, try to gauge the situation
'Fraid your train has been derailed
There's no use waiting in the station
Every engine's been dismantled, there's no other service coming
Charles is leading by example, he's the only train that's running
All in all, we're in a doozy of a mess
So, all aboard the WTF express
Should you want to stay safe, then I wouldn't play games
Or you'll learn another way of saying, "Run away, train!"
Every life has a light in the tunnel ahead
But you might just find that behind it instead
Of a heaven is an engine and the devil inbred
And we're next on the menu if we've left him unfed
Charlie, your timetable says it's almost time for tea
Charlie, and we've laid on quite a spread, as you can see
There's a choo-choo train coming after you
Food chain's gone a bit askew
Won't catch that train, if it's gonna catch you
For certain, worse than what they say to mind the gap for
The train's not just cancelled, it's damn well deplatformed!
Since it scampered off the tracks to
Find a snack from off your back lawn
Couple jackdaws and your cat and then your dad from off the back porch
He's hungry and he's hunting down the islanders
With a side of any siding-hiding bystanders
Quite queer what his dietary requirements are
But it's pretty clear regardless, he's a dining car
Coke? Coal? Petroleum? Alone, they'll never do