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Been cheatin' fate since '92
Caught sneakin' 'round the chimney flue
Ain't no angel, that's for sure
And Santa locked the liquor drawer
I got coal for Christmas, not a single bow
Guess my name's on that naughty scroll
But I'll burn it bright in the fire tonight
Keepin' warm in a sinner's glow
Drank the eggnog, wrecked the wreath
Swapped the cookies for a slab of beef
Mama said, "You're missin' church"
But I just laughed and said, "It could be worse"
I got coal for Christmas, not a single bow
Guess my name's on that naughty scroll
But I'll burn it bright in the fire tonight
Keepin' warm in a sinner's glow
Santa don't mind if you misbehave
He just makes sure you don't get saved
Still, I left him beer and a bluesy song
To keep his jolly old night rollin' strong
I got coal for Christmas, not a single bow
Guess my name's on that naughty scroll
But I'll burn it bright in the fire tonight
Keepin' warm in a sinner's glow