I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

I saw Mommy smoochin' Santa Claus

Underneath the Christmas tree last night

She puckered up her lips, pleasure she did seek

She missed his mouth and kissed his nose

And the darn thing sprung a leak

Then I heard Mommy tell old Santa Claus

Santa, you're a funny, fat old flirt

And you learned to kiss, no doubt

Playing bugle in the Boy Scouts

Santa baby, are you sure you ain't out hurt?

I saw Mommy smoochin' Santa Claus

Underneath the Christmas tree last night

Their smoochin' was so loud, it woke up Uncle Fud

It sounded like a cow a-pullin' her foot out of the mud

Then I shot Santy with a BB gun

And you should have heard old Santa squall

Well, he jumped up about ten feet

And then he took off up the street

And he hollered, "Merry Christmas to you all"