A Boozehound Named Barney

In front of a tavern

Flat on his face

A boozehound named Barney

Is pleading his case

Buy me a beer

Two bucks a glass

Come on, help me

I'm freezing my ass

Buy me brandy

A snifter of wine

Who am I kidding

I'll drink turpentine

Move it, you drunk

Or I'll blast your rear end

I've found two bucks

Then come in, my friend

And so, let us leave

On this heartwarming scene

Can I be a boozehound

Not till you're fifteen