I Spy

I spy a boy

I spy a girl

I spy the worst place

In the world

In the whole wide world

Oh, you didn't do bad

You made it out

I'm still stuck here

Oh, but I'll get out

Oh, yeah, I'll get out

Can't you see the giant that walks around you seeing through your petty lives?

Do you think I do these things for real, I do these things just so I survive

And you know I will survive

It may look to the untrained eye

I'm sitting on my ass all day

I'm biding time until I take you all on

My Lords and Ladies, I will prevail

I cannot fail 'cause I spy

Oh I've got your numbers, taken notes

I know the ways your minds work, I've studied

And your minds are just the same as mine

Except that you are clever swines

You never let mask slip, you never admit to it, you're never hurried

Oh, no, no, no

And every night I hone my plan

How I will get my satisfaction

How I will blow your paradise away away, away

'Cause I spy

And it's just like in the old days

I used to compose my own critical notices in my head

"The crowd gasp at Cocker's masterful control of the bicycle

Skilfully avoiding the dog turd next to the corner shop"

Imagining a blue plaque

Above the place I first ever touched a girl's chest

But hold on

You've got to wait for the best

You see, you should take me seriously

Very seriously indeed.

Cause I've been sleeping with your wife for the past sixteen weeks

Smoking your cigarettes

Drinking your brandy

Messing up the bed that you chose together

And in all that time I just wanted you to come home unexpectedly one afternoon

And catch us at it in the front room

You see I spy for a living

And I specialize in revenge

On taking the things I know will cause you pain

I can't help it