Текст пісні
The worst one, I guess, was in the Winter Olympics with the French judge
Once again, the French fuck with us, huh?
The Canadians, they skate perfectly, eh? We did it perfect, huh?
And then the Russians, they come, oh fuck!
They fucked up, and the French judge went, "How like life, they fucked up, I give it to them, huh?"
At that point, I'm going, where is Tonya Harding when you need her?
Tonya would have been on that judge like shit on Velcro!
She'd be going, give me that medal, you French whore!
I won!
But instead, we get to see Tonya fight Paula Jones in an all-white crash weekend
Turn the park Tuesday!
And Tonya went right for Paula, too, she went right for the nose
Not the nose, that's the Clinton money, not the nose!
And then next, it's going to be Joy Butterfuco fights John Wayne Bobbitt
There will be no hitting below the belt there, my friend
Oh, fuck, man, give it back!
My balls are in the front row!
What's next?
The Nixon daughters battle for the library money
Be there as my bitches go at it!
At this point, even Caligula's going, "What the fuck are you people doing?"
Why don't you have Hannibal Lecter on Iron Chef? Just kick out the jams
'Cause you've got the chamber, the chair, fear factor
People in Texas are going, "We got those shows
We just don't film them"
Two weeks ago, the Supreme Court banned execution of retarded people
And people in Texas are going, "Shit, where's the fun now?"
'Cause they were zapping retarded people every other week
It was like, "Go sit on Santa's lap, Timmy", that's right
And I know the definition of retarded in Texas is pretty wide
But, they're out there, man, crazy
That's wrong shit out there, it's pretty wild, too
You know, even the Taliban is going, "You are crazy motherfuckers"
There was a guy with one leg, they weren't going to give him a wooden leg
It was going to be dead man hopping, five, ten, 15, 28
But, there is a moment of compassion
Before the lethal injection, they do an alcohol swab, which is so nice