Текст пісні
Good evening and welcome to White World of Sports
Brought to you by Budweiser, breakfast of champions
Remember, when you're out of Bud puff Schlitz
And also by Pit Stop, the all-day deodorant for people who can't afford to wait
And today we journey to Sofia, Bulgaria
Where we're gonna be watching
The United States High School Championship basketball game between
The East Westchester North Stars, champions of the Southern Conference
Against the Bloods from Rap Brown Memorial High School in Newark, New Jersey
And tonight we will be talking to Coach Jojo Bubba Jr
Otherwise, known as Amguana Kickbooty
Take it away, Red
Howdy, this is red blazer
And I'm here courtside with the coach of the bloods
Tell us, coach, how are you going to get your boys up for tonight's game
"I'm gonna get booty," that's right, and I'm red blazer
And we're here courtside with the coach of the bloods
Coach, let's talk about your record
"My record?", that's right
"The hell you want to bring that up for, man
Well, hell, I thought you wanted to talk about basketball, man
Now, I did my time, man, I paid my debt to society, man
I don't need to be talking 'bout my record, man"
Oh, well, wait a minute
"How the hell I know she was 13? (No, no, coach, you misunderstand me)
Hell, she looked 15 anyway"
Yeah, Coach, what we meant is your one loss record, now
You're the winningest coach in the history of high school basketball
"That's right"
And your team has won over 455 games this season alone
"That's right"
And your star center, Tyrone Shoelaces, averaging over 132 points a game
"That's wrong" (wrong?)
"Yeah, he's averaging over 132 points a game"
Oh, that's right
Coach, let's talk about shoelaces for a bit
Here's a boy who's only 4'11", yet he leads the league in rebounding (that's right)
Uh, assists (that's right), scoring (that's right)
Scoring over 65 points a game (that's right)
He seems like he does everything but sell popcorn during halftime
"Uh, no, he don't sell popcorn"
Tell us, what is the secret of his success?
What makes him such a great basketball player?
"Well, why don't you just ask him that yourself?
Come on over here, Tyrone, come on over here
The man here wants to talk to you"
Uh, Tyrone, hello, glad to meet you, son
Um, Tyrone, what makes you such a great basketball player?
"What makes me such a great basketball player?
Well, that's simple, I got a basketball Jones"
"You hear that? He got a basketball Jones"
Basketball Jones? What's a basketball Jones?
"Go on and tell them where the basketball Jones is, Tyrone"
"What's a basketball Jones? That's simple
A basketball Jones is when you love basketball so much
You are like a junkie"