Built like a Wedge Tornader

This is a song about a very sensitive matter

That I've been keeping inside for too long

I was drunk at the bar

When a country girl caught me by surprise

She was built just like a wedge tornader

Five feet tall and four feet wide

She caught me while I was taking a gander

At those two Texas-sized hips

But instead of giving a slap to my face

She came over and gave it a kiss

You know, a girl like that can make a big old family

I've named our twelve fat kids, but I didn't even get her name

I like a girl who's built like a wedge tornader

And I ain't even got no shame