I'm a Mineralist

Here's a shocking revelation for you voyeurs

Such a heinous deviation, there are no cures

I'm a mineralist, I'm a mineralist

JUst the thought of ironing gives me spasms of lust

I creep up to hold wrecked cars and lick off the rust

I'm a mineralist, I'm a mineralist

Mother used to try to metal in my affairs

Keep your nose up off that grindstone, people will stare

Get the lead out of your pants and change your underwear

I've been stealing baby bottles since I was born

I'll go blind from balling bearings, doctors have warned

I like making out with steel-rimmed glasses more than horned

Erik Satie gets my rocks off, Cage is a dream

Philip Glass is mineralist to the extreme

I like tickling ivories and fingering stones

When my mercury goes up I play with my bone

People take for granite my pervversion is wrong

I'm not harming anyone by beating my gong

I'm a mineralist, I'm a mineralist

I'll make love to minerals as long as I can

And in fifty years I'll be a jaded old man

I'm a mineralist

I'm a mineralist

I'm a mineralist, I'm a mineralist

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Eric Wincentsen

267@ef.gc.maricopa.edu

Glendale Community College,

Glendale, Arizona

"Give me ten wheels for Jesus!"

-Elvis Hitler

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