Stop Talking About Comic Books or I'll Kill You (Live)

Stop talking about comic books or I'll kill you.

I don't care if the Hulk could defeat the Man of Steel.

I'm gonna rearrange your face if you continue to debate

Whether Logan's claws could pierce

Steve Roger's shield.

I just couldn't care less if they bring back Kraven,

And I don't care if Spiderman's a clone.

Stop spending all our cash on back issues of the Flash,

Or I swear to God you're gonna spend

your twilight years alone.

Okay, you can call them graphic novels,

But they're still just plain old comic books to me,

And I don't see why you must always ceaselessly discuss

The post-Zero hour continuity.

For the last time I won't read those Kirby X-men.

You know that I prefer the work he did for DC.

And if you don't want to die

you'll lose that Overstreet Price Guide,

Comic Buyer's Guide, and Wizard Magazine,

But please get the new Invisibles for me.