Zuhälterballade

So many years have vanished since the day

When she and I were partners, oh, what thrills

So many years, it seems so far away

I pleasured her, and she paid all my bills

Just like a marriage, but that doesn't pay

And when a client called, I'd tiptoe from our bed

And have a brandy at the pub to clear my head

I'd then collect the fee and softly say

"Oh, thank you, sir, please call again someday!"

For six whole months, we never got depressed

In that old whorehouse where we built our nest

So many years since then are dead and gone

He was my friend, I was a sweet young thing

When we ran out of cash, he'd hunt for things to pawn

And then I'd hear him say, "Hey, let me take that diamond ring"

Just like a marriage, minus the ring

I'd get so mad I'd sit for hours in the hall

And then I'd ask him where the hell he got the gall

He'd turn around, and he'd slug me in the jaw

I hurt so bad, I'd scream, "I'll call the law!"

Six months of love, no time to get depressed

In that old whorehouse where we built our nest

So many years since then have taken flights

Back then, life had its good points, not today

Although we never did make love at night

Since she had previous commitments, as I say

Not much like marriage, but good in its way

And then one day I felt something inside me hop

So after that, when we had sex, she got on top

Because we didn't want the baby to feel pain

Though we both knew the brat would end up down the drain

And that was that, to call it quits was best

And leave that whorehouse where we built our nest